Saturday 28 February 2009 @13:38
im glad i went for cell grp yesterday. we sang a song called There is A Place in Your Heart. it went "there is a place in Your heart i am longing to find. wont You show me. there is a place in Your heart i know i can run to and hide.wont You show me. show me (x2) show me Your Heart." God revealed Himself so real to me yestreday. I could really see Him in front of me and He showed me His nail-pieced hands. He didnt say much but I cried.
this few weeks have been very trying. as i see my friendships with others improving and some just breaking apart into pieces. theres a time for everything. its all part of His plan. sometimes i wonder why is it i seem to trust people more than i trust God. judging by the fact that i rely on my own strength so many times especially when it comes to studies. God has never let me down. Hes the One i should least doubt.
wanna thank the people who have been there for me throughout this period of time. the people who chose to care even though it was inconvenient. thanks jane, jonovan and weilin. i guess thats how you become the salt and light of the world. by caring when others dont.
its time for me to care more about others. friendship should not just be focused on what your friend can do for you but what you can do for them. its something irrational... emotions are irrational. but sometimes, they just have to take precedence.
RCLF publicity is taking a toll on me. so is jc life. A levels seems so important. after all, its gona determine my job.
God told me, not to be discouraged. its true. ive been very discouraged these days. especially since the amount of effort i have put into publicity seemed to hv come to naught.
All things happen for a reason.
the Lord will be my CONFIDENCE. (proverbs)
Thursday 19 February 2009 @23:05
if only people could just show a little more concern.
im overworked.
Friday 13 February 2009 @16:21
Happy Valentine's Day everyone! :)
today was a good day with lots of chocolate (though it isnt my favourite type of food XD)
I just wanna thank all the people who took the effort to make this day so great for everyone. :) they include
- my cca chairperson Charles
- Kelly
- Ngan the koala
- Jia Ying the salad queen
- Zheng Pei my bike buddy!!!!
- Jane my bestie!
- Troy the himbo
- Sam my old friend from back in sec 1 :)
- Amy my good friend :)
- Michelle, my future general practitioner
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, MY CT MR CHAN!!! who made a flower shaped balloon caricature for each one of us. it totally made my day :)
one thing ive learnt from Mr Chan today is that a teacher doesnt just teach, he makes the effort to love. you can love someone from the inside, but it counts for naught if no action is taken.
do you speak ur friends' love language? my brother told me that the top 2 love language for girls are physical touch and perhaps acts of service. well at least i know mine is acts of service :)
this valentines' day means so much cos i got a chance to appreciate my friends for who they are and i was in turn appreciated by them :) which is really a sweet feeling.
thanks everyone for making this day great :)
Love you guys!
Saturday 7 February 2009 @23:57
God told me to really let go... i wonder how many times He has told me that but ive never been able to 100% do it. Satan keeps attacking me. he really doesnt makes things easy for me. and the voice of the Holy Spirit is just so soft compared to the voices i hear from Satan. i just gotta choose who to listen to.
Dont look back... look forward. thats what i gotta do. yes it can be quite annoying that people can move on faster than you, but its not abt what they can do now. its about what i have to do.
how does it feel to know that people dont care? i wonder if you ever felt that way. cos i have. and i still do. cos its a fact. no human cares more about you than yourself. and its understandable. but God, cares for everyone of us.
one thing that i feel is very important was mentioned once by my cgl. never be too busy for your friends. especially when they come up and look for you for encouragement. and they need not be sad to need encouragement. cos each time you turn down a conversation, especially in such situations, you unknowingly shut a door between you and your friend. and i wonder how many doors there are left before an impenetrable wall is forged. my goal this year is to keep the doors connecting me to my friends open. i will make the effort to uplift, to encourage, to spend time with people. i will not let others feel what ive been feeling since the start of this year.
never be too busy for a friend. cos God was never too busy for you. :)
of course, we need to study for exams. there may be situations in which we simply cannot put our work down... in such situations, i hope i will make the effort to get back to the person. especially since this year its the A levels.
i need to let go of the stifling thought that no one cares. cos it isnt important anymore. cos what matters is that I care. and i believe, as long as one person cares in this world, God can still move. :)
Dear Lord, will you help me care more about others. will you help me let go of the past even though it seems to stare right at my face everyday. Thank you for reminding me that in You, ALL things are new.
In Jesus' name,
Amen :)
Monday 2 February 2009 @16:33
Praise Jesus. I managed to run 4 rounds the track today without feeling like vomiting. :) seems like i will be able to take 2.4km run. duno if thats a good thing or a bad thing. thank God for peace. thank God for my friend Shiao who prays for me. thank God for Jane who never forgets me. thank God for my parents though at times they do nag. thank God that i understand macroecons. thank God that i can concentrate better in class now. thank God for being all powerful, for never forsaking me even though i was spiritually dry. Thank you for reminding me when ive done wrong and thank you for the joy of the Lord i experienced today.
i pray for greater strength, greater capacity and greater joy. that i will not crave for attention but be satisfied with what i have. i pray that i will become more secure and confident in my capabilities and in who i am in Christ. I'm God's princess! :)
Praise be to the King, my El Shaddai, God of more than enough :)